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Thursday, June 23, 2011

Where Women Eye the New Pimp Game: A "Ho" in America Would be a "Socialite" in the Un...

Where Women Eye the New Pimp Game: A "Ho" in America Would be a "Socialite" in the Un...: "Recently I had a friendly debate with an intriguing woman. 'I went to a very conservative college but I was raised in a more sexually liber..."

A "Ho" in America Would be a "Socialite" in the United Kingdom

Recently I had a friendly debate with an intriguing woman.  "I went to a very conservative college but I was raised in a more sexually liberated environment, so after I'd slept with more than 3 guys at the same college, I was known as one of the campus hos!"

This woman then raised a valid question in our conversation: "Is promiscuity largely defined by the social norms, beliefs and values of specific groups, cultures, races and gender?  If so, is it fair to label a woman a ho in one social circle or culture when in another more progressive environment she would be the norm?"

To me, she raised a powerful question.

So much so that I began looking into how other countries define promiscuity.  In America during the 70s, 80s, 90s and early 2000 I believe that the infamous double standard was in full play.  For example, if a man slept with 10 women, he's deemed a playboy.  By contrast, if a woman slept with 10 different men, she'd be labeled a "ho" by men and shunned by other women.

However, with the rise of video vixens, sexy reality television stars, celebrity groupies that bed celebrities- what was once simply "ho" behavior is unofficially morphing into the rebel movement to destroy the infamous double standard.  Simply put, the hos are winning now.  But not without backlash. I'm of the opinion that people (especially women) love to hate women like Kim Kardashian, Amber Rose, Karinne Stephans, Kat Stacks, Evelyn Lozada and other modern female media sex symbols because such women are not "in line" with fearing or being controlled by the age old double standard.

Women that have tried to "be good girls" and even subscribed to and obeyed the double standard set by men, do not want hos to win!  Kim Kardashian gets engaged and there is a huge number of women and men on pens and needles hoping another recent sex tape emerges with her cheating on her fiancee.  Amber Rose goes from Kanye West to Wiz Khalifa and everyone wants to see her finally unable to pull another celebrity boyfriend.  Karinne Stephans writes 2 bestsellers based on her real life sexual escapades and she's now categorized as a has-been ho with no real talent.  Kat Stacks bagged a number of rappers and she's been damn near exiled to prison!!!  Evelyn is probably the most evil pretty woman on reality television but she's nabbed Ocho and most viewers are watching to see when someone is gonna finally slap the mess out of her.  Pimpin is hard but bein' a ho ain't no joke either.

Most women don't want to see the so-called or alleged "ho" be rewarded for defying the rule of the infamous double standard.

All this fuss made me wonder how the rest of the world might view hos in America.  I read this article back in 2008 titled, "Britain on Top in Casual Sex League" that described a research study conducted at Bradley University in Illinois.  The study was conducted by asking 14000 people in 48 different countries to fill out an anonymous questionnaire.  Respondents were asked about numbers of partners and one night stands, and their attitudes were assessed by asking them how many people they planned to sleep with over the next five years and how comfortable they were with the idea of casual sex.  In all, the United Kingdom, Germany, Netherlands, Czech Republic and Australia all scored higher on the promiscuity scale than the United States!  Damn.  Are the hos in those 5 countries on some other level ho hoppin'?  Or are our standards and definitions around promiscuity and sexuality simply narrow minded and outdated?

I think the later.

Don't be so hard on the hos.  Perhaps we all need to put things into context and stop thinking that our way of thinking makes the world go 'round.  Seems that the U.K. could give two shits about what Americans think of super groupie Chris O'Dell.  A ho in America would simply be an upscale Socialite in the UK.  That's kinda cool.  

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Where Women Eye the New Pimp Game: 10 Ways to Know You're a Po' Dumb Ho If....

Where Women Eye the New Pimp Game: 10 Ways to Know You're a Po' Dumb Ho If....: "1. All your relationships end tragically because of your cheating, risque photos or videos sent to your unsuspecting man, or flat out gettin..."

10 Ways to Know You're a Po' Dumb Ho If....

1. All your relationships end tragically because of your cheating, risque photos or videos sent to your unsuspecting man, or flat out getting caught being a ho.

2.  You have more than one baby daddy and both men swear you are a ho.
3.  You are known as a ho by more than two groups of male friends who have all had their turn between  your legs.
4.  You have had phone sex for free with more than two men.
5.  Men know your name before you open your mouth and attempt to get you drunk or high before you've known them even 24 hours.
6.  You are cheating on a broke man for richer men, but still come home to your broke man empty handed.
7.  Whenever you hear the names Kardashian, Amber Rose, CoCo, Karinne Stephans or Evelyn and you cringe, not because of moral reservations, but you know you missed the chance to do what they did!
8.  Old boyfriends meet you years later and can still get you to do some ho' shit within 24- 72 hours.
9.  You start getting action from guys that were below your league years before, but 2 - 3 kids later with no man and no money- you'd kill for one of those tech or science nerds you dismissed in high school for the basketball and football players all now married to better women than you.
10.  You have to get a payday loan to buy tickets to fly to Miami, Atlanta, Los Angeles, Las Vegas or new York to go to a VIP Party full of celebrities and athletes in order to invest in your future.

Monday, June 20, 2011

One Love?

Women cheat.  Men cheat.  Marriages fail.  Relationships fall apart.  Working in this nightlife not only affords me good times, money, travel opportunities and the company of intriguing personalities, I often witness married men and sometimes women stray from their partners.  Surprisingly, even what appears to be the most devout married couple could very well indeed be more than meets our eyes.  Like most Americans, I was introduced to the concept of monogamy at birth.  One women, one man, loyalty and faithfulness was packaged and sold to me and millions of other men and women.

To their credit, some people actually are fulfilled by monogamy.  To them, I congratulate the same way that I applaud people who have managed to find happiness in plural relationships.  Yes, the very idea and reality of multiple partners is alive and well in more places than "common folk" would ever imagine.  Unfortunately, the majority of such plural arrangements are either hidden to monogamous eyes or deemed fantastical swinging or open relationships- frequently labeled perverse by self-righteous monogamists.

Yet cheating is as common among traditional relationships as love triangles exist in plural arrangements.  What do I mean by relationship plurality?  One man is attached to more than one "aware" woman.  By aware I mean that the women are aware they are committed to the same man, know of or even befriend one another, and are consenting to the plurality of the arrangement.  Sure polygamy is not legal in America, but that does not mean that consenting adults are breaking the law while having plural relationships.  Of course, in all fairness a woman could be committed to men that are aware they are sharing one woman as well.  Not exactly my preference, but to be fair, such arrangements are possible too.

The main question is, why would anyone, male or female, subscribe to a plural relationship?

More to come...

Thursday, June 9, 2011

Exotic = Black = Bullshit

To all my readers, my sincerest apologies for my brief absence.  I've been busier than ever.  From Miami to Atlanta to Los Angeles and now I'm back in Chicago.  The nightclub business is alive and well and I've been putting together a new team of dancers to do traveling shows under the Lair Haven banner.  In short, business is booming.

Funny thing though, I am somewhat agitated.

Sometimes I observe mainstream media and listen to "everyday people" discuss what is sexy or beautiful.  Kim Kardashian is known for her big booty.  Coco, the wife of Ice-T, is known for her big booty.  Angelina Jolie has those trademarked big lips.  Jessica Alba and Jessica Biel both have curvy bodies.  The list of caucasian or non-black women that have been elevated to statuses of sex symbols and make mainstream dollars goes on and one.  Yet for every snow bunny with a booty and big lips I can name a black woman with equal or better physical features.

Still, even in 2011, black models/actresses/performers don't make as much money as white or non-black models/dancers.  You mean to tell me that someone as sexy as Megan Good does not compare to Megan Fox of the Transformers?  Someone like Zoe Saldona does not compare to Angelina Jolie or Natalie Portman?  

Even in the adult film industry, most of the female performers like Tara Patrick, Sasha Grey, Naomi, Bree Olsen and Jenna Haze clock millions.  While top ebony video vixens and performers Jada Fire, Vanessa Blue, Lacey Duvalle, Pinky, Kitten and  Ayana Angel never really achieve the mainstream status like Tara Patrick, Jenna Jameson, or Kendra the Playboy Chick.  Obviously all of these women are physically attractive.  Psychological complications aside, all of them would get a rise of of any man attracted to sensual ladies with extraordinary sexual drives.

My assertion is this: many of the white actresses/performers gain fame and higher booking fees because they have exotic physical features not always found on the typical white girl like bigger booties, boobs, hips and lips, all of which can be found on most black women.

In other words, a white girl with a black girl's booty will make more money than a black girl with a black girl's booty and a black girl with white girl features- it's a fact.  Is it fair?  Fuck no!

Trust me, I've been breaking in and managing female entertainers long enough to compare their earnings and for me, my effectiveness is measured in dollars.  I've watched plenty of big bootied blondes and brunette white dames from places like Texas, Alabama, Atlanta and Florida come into strip joints and clean the floor with black chicks on tips alone!  I've witnessed black dancers/performers try to make a living off catering to only black audiences and even those with solid fan bases never reach the same financial status as the white or non-black chicks that usually hold down both black audiences and non-black fans.  So for me the equation is simple, female performers that want to secure top billings and reach mainstream status have to have a core audience and cross-over appeal to maximize their profits.

Still, white and latina women have an easier time crossing over and still keeping their core fans- but I'm positive it's because they are not black women.  The ebony females that are dancers or adult film stars that make real money do  have solid black fan bases.  Eventually, the ladies that want to collect higher fees and gain cross-over appeal begin to work the white boy circuit, sometimes the black men that previously supported their work do not keep supporting- the same way that many of the top white female adult entertainers do not film interracial scenes if they have a huge white fan base of white boys that don't always want to see their white porn star with a big black dick.  Yes, racism exist even in the sex industry- crazy, right?  I don't blame the performers, I blame history and the hypocrisy of society.

A white chick with "exotic" features can make more money off her "exotic" features than a black girl can just being herself.  That's some bullshit, straight-up.

As a modern day libertine, I don't discriminate but I don't make up my own facts either.  Money is money and I keep my stable of female performers and hustlers as diverse as an underground fetish carnival of freaks, it is what it is.